Pain-to-Power recipe

More information
Explanation | A4 pdf
Step 1. Find the Trigger so that your co-worker can play it back to you

What do you want to achieve?

To overcome a negative thought about yourself.
•  What negative thought do you want to tackle? 

•  Make a trigger sentence out of it that starts with "You must / You are ..."

•  Test the trigger by having your co-worker say it to you.

•  If you find yourself reacting strongly to the trigger, proceed to the next step. Welke negatieve gedachte wil je aanpakken?
To respond more effectively to someone's troublesome behaviour
• Describe that difficult behaviour as literally as possible
  and especially what you find so difficult about it.

• Ask your co-worker to replay that trigger behaviour or sentence to you.

• If you find yourself reacting strongly to the trigger, proceed to the next step.
You should tell your co-worker each time when to replay the trigger.
Step 2. Throw everything out

Options to respond to the trigger by:

•    making non-verbal sounds and movements

•    saying whatever you have to say.

•    behaving like a playful, provocative child.

Step 3. Go deeper: Where does the trigger resonate in your body?
  1. Describe literally this sensation, the "Felt Sense".
     
  2. Does this "Felt Sense" remind you of a situation in your past? If so, make a “picture’ of it, so that you can process your memory of the situation later.
     
  3. What does this "Felt Sense" evoke?

       •    sounds and / or movements,

       •    words or song?

Step 4. Feed your brain with possible new responses

1.   Try new responses when the co-worker replays the trigger to you.

2.  What can you learn from your co-worker?
       a. Turn the roles around: you replay the trigger; your co-worker responds.
       b. Turn the roles again:
            try to respond to the trigger as your co-worker did.

3.  List your options while counting them on your fingers.
     Supports developing pathways in your brain.

Step 5. What after this session?

Imagine a few following small steps. 
For instance:

•    To whom can I talk about this?

•    Where can I find more information?

Step 6.  Dis-identify your co-worker from the trigger role

•    How is your co-worker different from playing the trigger role?
•    Check with your co-worker whether s/he feels sufficiently dis-identified.

Complete the session